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Color Struck!

Posted By Mocha Chick on Nov 13, 2012 at 2:52PM

I for one get so tired of people saying, you are pretty especially for a dark skinned girl! WHAT?! It's 2012 people! Why is America still so color struck? I started to pay closer attention to the ads I saw in magazines and on TV and I quickly noticed that more often than not Black women with light skin were held up as the standard of beauty. Now down't get me wrong, I'm happy when any woman of color is used in a national ad campaign however, it bothers me that to most people dark skin is still something that is thought of as less than! Take a look at these ads:
Did you notice anything about the above ads? Well if not I'll point out the obvious, they are all very beautiful light skin Black Women. Now you may be thinking, so what? Well, growing up as a little girl in America you look for images that you can relate to in the media. If you can't find anyone that you identify with you begin to think that maybe there is something wrong with you, particularly when it comes to your skin color. For me I had all types of self esteem issues related to my skin growing up as a child. I HATED the fact that my skin was so dark. Looking at my Mom who is considered by many to be fare for me she represented beauty. Now my mom never really said anything to make me feel insecure about my skin but I always felt like I was ugly because I had a deep brown skin complexion.

Being that my background comes from that of a Journalist, I pay extra attention to the hidden messages and themes in ads, movies, and TV when it comes to race. One day I had an assignment where I had to watch TV for an hour and count how many black people I saw in the ads. I don't remember the exact results but what I can say is that on the particular day I gathered my data for the assignment there were very few commercials that had women of color light or dark represented in the commericals.

So when I heard the announcement that Janelle Monáe an up and coming music artist was picked as the new Covergirl I was ecstatic! I was like finally Dark Skin is being celebrated in America! You might think this isn't that deep of an issue but for me and other dark skin women of color it matters to see women like us represented!
It was also a breakthrough when Gabrielle Union was named the new face of Neutrogena a few short years ago.
My whole point in writing this post was to bring attention to the fact that yes, America is making progress in terms of race relations. However, there is still a long way to go! I believe that beauty should be celebrated independent of color! There are so many shades and variations when it comes to various ethnic groups and I feel that it's been time for America to realize that there is more than one standard of beauty that should be represented in mainstream advertisements! So kudos to the companies that are choosing to hire Black Women of any complexion! Black is Beautiful in all its various shades!

iPad Mini! Yay!

Posted By Mocha Chick on Oct 27, 2012 at 7:46PM

I couldn't be happier to announce that Apple has finally officially unveiled its iPad Mini! The iPad Mini has a 7.9 inch display and from reviews I've read it feels light yet solid! Being that I currently own a Nook Color I am really a fan of the iPad Mini Size! I was actually just at the Barnes & Nobel store, and I was looking at the handouts they were giving out about their new Nook HD and Nook HD+. I was thinking about upgrading to one of those being that I absolutely LOVE my Nook Color. The thing about my Nook Color is that while it's a great e-reader it's not that great of a tablet. Sure you can check your email, read your favorite magazines, and even log on to Facebook... BUT the way in which it works can be a bit bothersome.... Simply put, it's an e-reader NOT a Tablet.


 

You may be thinking, why do you need an iPad if you have a Nook Color? Well, being that I'm a Blogger and that I'm immersed in all things technology related owning an iPad is something that would seem to be Natural. Basically, even with all of the Applications that Nook offers it still is very much limited when compared to the capabilities of the iPad. On the iPad I will pretty much be able to be a lot more productive than the Nook Color Allows. I will be able to create rather than just view content. That's the easiest way for me to explain the difference. On the one hand the Nook is excellent at allowing you to view various forms of media be it music, pictures, the Internet, whatever really. But when it comes to creating something on the Nook Color good luck! You're in for a HUGE headache. Sure the people over at Barnes & Nobel will tell you the Nook is just as good or better as the iPad and they know that's a BOLD FACE LIE!

Don't get me wrong, I'm not knocking the Nook at all as I said I love my Nook Color. But, it simply isn't a Tablet. Tablets allow you to create and view which makes a world of difference to someone like myself. 

Did I mention that the iPad Mini is starting at $329! 

 

 

Live Your Life!

Posted By Mocha Chick on Sep 30, 2012 at 11:40AM

The Girlfriend Code?!

Posted By Mocha Chick on Sep 30, 2012 at 11:25AM



Ok what is a Girlfriend when you are an adult?! I keep asking myself this question because from my view Men expect a Girlfriend to act like a Wife WITHOUT the TITLE of WIFE! I'm just calling it as I see it. Let's run thought the typical expectations of most Men I encounter:

1. Sex
2. A Cook
3. A maid
4. Total Loyalty 
5. Honestly

Being that the above are not really things that most men these days will do without it sometimes becomes difficult from my perspective to understand how I'm expected to do all that and be just a GIRLFRIEND! Now, the above list I have come to understand applies to Men all Men regardless of religious affiliation. Surprising, isn't it... I have dated Men that claim to be Seventh-Day Adventist yet still expect Sex on the second or third date! 

I find it hilarious that many adults in my parents generation actually believe that there is this MASSIVE difference when it comes to dating a Man who is Adventist vs. Non-Adventist. Fact is a Man is either a Man of God or they aren't. Sure things are easier when you date someone who has the same religious affiliation as you do. But, to be honest I don't really like dating Adventist Men. I feel this way because Adventist Men usually have this air of arrogance in that they are somehow the cream of the crop because they happen to be single, "saved", and oftentimes educated. 

These Men have a since of entitlement. I've even been asked to list my past relationships so that He could decide if I was worthy of a second date! WHAT?! Worthy?! Of course after that comment, I kindly excused myself from the date! I left shaking my head thinking, Wow really, He wasn't even cute! I was simply going on the "date" to appease those who might ask if I give Adventist Men a chance. 

Fact is I try my hardest to try to like Adventist Men. BUT I can't help but feel so judged when I'm in their presence. You know the double standard exists in the church! You know the concept that it's perfectly accepted for an Adventist Man to go out and sow his wild oaks and then to come back around to Jesus and then find a Marry a Adventist Woman 5 years His junior who has little to no life experience meaning basically a virgin! 

I am overlooked, I feel by many Adventist Men because to be honest. I don't present myself as a Bible thumping, No Makeup wearing, No Jewelry wearing, Modest, quiet, Woman. I don't even attempt to appear to be anything other than what I am. So because I wear my jewelry to church and loud nail polish while often times rocking the latest in hair and makeup trends I am overlooked. 

Then I come in contact with Men outside of the "Church Walls" and to them they feel like I am a rare find. They treat Me like I am a Queen. They tell Me how special I am and how lucky they would be if I chose to spend my life with them!

They want Me to be their GIRLFRIEND! You know the Girlfriend that meets the above list of requirements! You know the Girlfriend that has regular sex with them, cooks for them, cleans for them occasionally, and shows them complete loyalty! At first glace this doesn't sound to bad because Adventist Men ask for the same in terms of their expectations. The fundamental difference I see is an Adventist Man will have try to have sex with Me then look down his nose if I choose to comply. Then have a nerve to tell Me I'm not Wife material if I will have SEX with him before marriage! 

Wait, WHAT?! Come again?! Just a few hours ago you the (Adventist Man) was attempting to touch every inch of my body in an attempt to get me to sleep with him. Then when I say no or say hey aren't you moving a little fast. Then they say, Aww, We've been cool for years why you acting funny? You know we all have needs we're both grown. So what you going to do? Then I say well... You have a point. But then something in Me screams, "HELL NO"! So I say you know what I'm good, I'll see you at church Sabbath. Then I walk off...

Then I find myself, right back in the familiar arms of someone who isn't Adventist. Why?! Well because I'd rather be with a Man who won't judge Me. The difference being the non-Adventist has no real expectations other than the above list because honestly they aren't looking to be married. In most cases they just want the milk like the old saying says, but have absolutely no intentions on buying the cow. 

In the end, I'm left there single. Not really looking for a Man but still finding myself hardly ever alone... I find myself wanting the title but making no progress in positioning myself to be a wife... Ugh... It sucks, but hey this is my life right now... Kinda sad when you think about it but it is what it is. I wonder if I will ever be someone's life partner? I wonder if I will get my happy ending? Will I get the Husband, and the Children. Or will I continue to find myself when Men who want it all from Me but won't make Me an honest Woman? Hmm... Only God know's how My Life will continue to unfold... 

 

Perception vs. Reality

Posted By Mocha Chick on Sep 29, 2012 at 2:35PM

Do you ever get tired of being judged? Does it ever get on your nerves when someone looks at you and walks away with the wrong conclusion about you? I feel that I am often MISUNDERSTOOD. I get so tired of people not understanding my motives or seeing what my true intentions are.

It frustrates Me to no end when I hear how someone might have saw me somewhere and comes away with the wrong assessment of who I am. For so many years I have felt as if I wasn't attractive. I felt that because I looked the way that I do that there must be something wrong with Me if I illicit negative attention simply based on my appearance. 

It my opinion, people interpret data, situations, and circumstances based off of the sum of their life experiences. It is with this worldview that they view the rest of the world. Almost like each of us are born with clear glasses that over time become tinted due to the interactions we have with our family, friends, and society as a whole. 

For so many years I felt ashamed of my curves. I felt like I always had to cover up my body so that I could make sure that people didn't view me in a negative way. When I look in the mirror, it is sometimes very hard for me to understand how someone can totally misunderstand my appearance. However, I have come to understand that people are going to think what they want regardless. I feel that God has made Me the way that I am! 

I am so much more than what meets the eye!


I will no longer be made to feel less than just because at certain times I may choose to express myself differently at a given time. I feel that there is a time and place for everything. Clearly the outfit that I have on in this picture isn't appropriate for certain venue's such as maybe a community service event. However, I feel that what I am wearing captures my femininity in a way that says I am a Confident Woman who isn't afraid of who she is. 

If I choose to dress in this way that doesn't mean that all of a sudden my morals have dissolved. It simply means that this is the specific way I have chosen to present myself at that time. Then if I choose to wear a business suit that conceals most of my curves all of a sudden I'm sending a totally different message. I have reached the point in my life where I no longer try to make everyone around Me happy. I no longer aspire to meet the expectations of others. I am who I am. One can either like Me or choose not to. 


Those that take the time to read my Blog posts know that there are times when I choose to share things that are very personal. This is one of those times. For Me writing is a way that enables Me to vent. In a way writing is a sort of therapy. Prior to writing this I felt quite honestly irritated. However, now that my fingers are caressing the keys of this keyboard it's as if I can almost feel the tension melting from my shoulders and neck. 

The point of this post was for Me to vent. I want to encourage You my readers to be the Author of Your Life! Be the Star in your Life. Don't allow those around you to write Your Story! For so many years we have to as people allow our parents and or guardians to help us mold into individuals. However, there comes a point in life when you have to choose to stand up for what you believe. There comes a time when we all have to be ok with who we are. I am NOT ashamed of who I am! I am for the first time in my life becoming comfortable in my own skin! 

To write that and to really believe that I am ok with the Woman that I am is very significant in my life. I challenge you to live your life! Be who you are! Those that truly love You will accept You. After all, if God loves Me just as I am why would I care if someone else doesn't approve. It is God and God alone who knows my heart. I don't have to try to rationalize my life choices to anyone. Remember God is the only One who has control over your Life, Future, and Soul Salvation. 

So don't give others the power over you to break you down emotionally with their negativity or critical comments regarding who you are! Just don't do it! I can tell you for years I allowed those closest to Me to hurt Me to the point beyond tears. It is because I want acceptance and love that I am able to be vulnerable in that way. But is is through life experience, that I have learned that I can't allow others to dictate to Me how I should live My life or what type of Woman I should be. I believe with every fiber of my being that I am growing emotionally and spiritually. I am not the scared, timid Woman I used to be. I am Me and that is all! 

Be the Author of Your Life! Allow God to lead You and those that don't understand your life journey understand You don't have to explain yourself to anyone! 

Crown Royal

Posted By Mocha Chick on Sep 27, 2012 at 2:57PM

*BELOW YOU WILL FIND THE LYRICS FOF AN ORIGINAL SONG BY JILL SCOTT
 
Your hands on my hips pull me right back to you, 
 
I Catch that thrust give it right back to you,

you're in so deep I'm breathing for you,you

Grab my braids arch my back high for you your

Diesel engine,I'm squirting mad oil ah

Down on the floor til my speaker starts to boil I flip sh*t
 
Quick slip
 
Hip dip

And I'm twisted
In your hands and your lips and your tongue tricks

and you're so thick and you're so thick and you're so

Crown Royal on ice

Crown Royal on ice (On Ice)

Crown Royal on ice

Crown Royal on ice (On Ice) 

Your hands on my hips pull me right back to you, I Catch that thrust give it right

 
back to you, you're In so deep I'm breathing for you,
 
you Grab my braids arch my back high for
 
you your Diesel engine,I'm squirting mad oil ah
 
Down on the floor til my speaker starts to boil
 
I flip sh*t
 
Quick slip
 
Hip dip
 
And I'm twisted
 
In your hands and your lips and your tongue tricks
 
and you're so thick and you're so thick
 
and you're so
 
Crown Royal on ice
 
Crown Royal on ice (On Ice)
 
Crown Royal on ice

Crown Royal on ice (On Ice)

The Rebound Chick

Posted By Mocha Chick on Sep 24, 2012 at 1:36PM

Have you ever watched a show on TV when people were talking about being in a Love Triangle? Or have You ever witnessed a friend go thought a similar situation? Recently, I have had a rare look at this type of relationship.

From what I'm gathering.... No one just wakes up and decides, "Hey I want to be stuck in a LOVE TRIANGLE!" Rather, two people meet then sometimes without realizing it one starts to develop feelings for the other person. The next thing I have observed is the Man or Woman on the outside doesn't always know they are on the outside... Meaning upon the first interaction the one that is in the relationship might not tell the new person that they are in a relationship of some sort. 

But at some point, it is no longer possible for the other person to hide or explain why they are only able to talk or go out at certain times. It is at this point that honesty is key. It is at this time once a friendship of has been established that it is critical for the person involved in the relationship to be honest with the outside person. 

Once the person on the outside is made aware of the fact that the person they thought was just a person of interest is actually involved with another party. It is up to that outside person to excuse themselves from the situation.

HOWEVER, this often isn't the case! Often times, the outside person feels cheated because they didn't expect to be confronted with the reality that the person they were falling for actually isn't single.... Often times these LOVE TRIANGLE situations are messy because everyone has varying levels of attachment.

For the couple, they clearly are experiencing a rough patch. It is this rough patch that has caused the room for the outside person to slide in... Keep in mind the outside person may or may not know about the relationship of the outside party...

I love to study the behavior of people around Me. I feel that I can learn something from most everyone I am around. So during my "research" for this post I took a hard look in the mirror. I asked myself what would I do if I found out I was the third person in a relationship!

Oh my WORD! I can hardly imagine such a thing... In my observation, I learned that the Woman that thinks she's just having issues with her Man seems to push him away by her constant nagging. BUT it is to my surprise that some Men actually like to be nagged by the one they love... SHOCKING right!

Some Men actually look forward to frantic calls and angry voice mails! You can't believe that can you! I couldn't either, until I saw it, with my own eyes. It seems that the Man I was observing, even thought he might be a little irritated at the content of the argument that he sincerely enjoyed hearing the voice and concerns of the one who has held his heart for years. Even after all of the tears, fights, and drama both parties are still in love.

So what comes of the Lady who finds out she's now apart of a Drama filled LOVE Triangle... Does she stay and fight for a future with the Man who still clings to his former or current love? Or does she just dust off her shoes, and pick up her heart... You know the one she so willingly gave to a Man she trusted... and move on? 

Hmm... Only time will tell... This post may come off as being personal and that would be because it is... However, it's not as personal as you might think. I just simply wanted to share my take on this controversial relationship type with the intent of bringing this topic to the forefront for discussion... So comment, share,and be inspired! As always, thanks for reading! 

 

With Love,

Mocha Chick

 

OMG iPhone 5 is Here!!!!

Posted By Mocha Chick on Sep 19, 2012 at 6:00PM

Yay!!!! The wait is over! iPhone 5 is here! I'm so EXCITED! I watched the CNET review on the CBS Morning show today! I have to be honest. As I was watching the screen I felt as if my mouth was watering, my heart rate was elevated, and I truly felt as if I saw my soul-mate for the first time! I mean all of the things that iPhone 5 can do is just like WOW! I mean you have to first understand the mindset of an Apple Geek such as myself. I love Apple because Apple products allow me to do what I like to do efficiently. Apple products are always well made and they are always SLEEK and Sexy and to TOP it off Apple stands behind their products. Being a  Apple Fan is hard for some to understand because its truly a religion on some level. There is a religious reverence that I have for Apple. I know you may feel like I'm going WAY too deep over a electronic device but I'm just being honest. I simply love Apple. 


Ever since my Gateway crashed in college and I got my first Apple Powerbook which is a laptop that by the way I still have and it still works. I've had it for over 7 years and it works better than most PC based operating system laptops. The thing with Apple is ahh... what can I say Apple is a lifestyle, a culture, a mindset. Apple is much more than a Brand because it enables people to do more with their creativity than they realized. Using a Apple Product allows you to simply work without being bothered about the mechanics of how you're doing it. With Apple you turn it on and it just works! There's no downloading of massive stuff like you have to do with PC based machines. There's NO mess! That is why Apple is all about making products that last and making them easy to use. It's such a nice experience when someone who is used to using a PC learns how to use a Apple product for the first time.

For Me it's a ah ha moment, you know when the light bulb goes off and the person realizes MAN this is so SIMPLE and Wow look at what I can do! Apple empowers their users with great customer service through Apple Care and also by offering One to One "Memberships" where you can get lessons at an Apple store on how to best use a software package like Adobe Photoshop on your Apple Computer. In short I simply can't wait to get my hands on the iPhone 5! I will now post a few pictures of the iPhone 5. The first picture shows you the previous iPhone4s next to the new iPhone 5 as a comparison. 

According to CNET, the only phone that has even a chance to compete with the iPhone 5 is the New Galaxy S III from Samsung.... I like Android Phones because you can customize them more than you can an iPhone.... BUT for Me Android applications are a HIT or Miss type of situation... Sometimes they work and other times the applications freeze your phone and or make it run very slowly... Not cool at all... So You've waited long enough... Drum role Please!!! Ta Da.... Introducing iPhone 5

 

Love,

Mocha Geek Chick 

Y'all know what it is... I'm a Gadget Chick! If it has an on or off button on it there's a good chance I either own the device or I'm in the process of buying it.... I LOVE Gadgets!

Hot Styles for Fall

Posted By Mocha Chick on Sep 18, 2012 at 10:57AM

With the change of seasons comes brand new colors and styles. I have compiled some beautiful fall looks to fit almost any woman of color. I got many of the images from Essence Magazine Online and the remainder I got from Google Images. Every Woman loves to update or switch up our looks especially with the change of a season. So I hope you enjoy the fall looks and maybe even find a hair style you'd like to try!

Comment, Share, Be Inspired!

With Love,

Mocha Chick

Melanie Fiona Hallim

A Grammy Award Winning Canadian R&B recording artist. She was born and raised in Toronto. Born: July 4, 1983 (age 29), Toronto Wikipedia

Lauren Keyana "Keke" Palmer

An American actress, singer-songwriter, dancer, fashion designer, voice actress, and activist.Born: August 26, 1993 (age 19)Wikipedia


Former America's Next Top Model Contestant


Corinne Bailey Rae 

A British singer-songwriter and guitarist from Leeds, West Yorkshire. Bailey Rae was named the number-one predicted breakthrough act of 2006 in an annual BBC poll of music critics, Sound of 2006.

Born: February 26, 1979 (age 33) Wikipedia


Sanaa McCoy Lathan
An American actress and voice actress. She has starred in numerous movies, including the box-office hits Love & Basketball, Alien vs. Predator, Something New, and The Family That Preys. Born: September 19, 1971 (age 40) Wikipedia

Jordin Brianna Sparks
An American pop and R&B recording artist, songwriter and actress. At the age of 17, Sparks won the sixth season of American Idol, becoming the youngest winner in American Idol . Born: December 22, 1989 (age 22) Wikipedia

Laila Amaria Ali
A retired American professional boxer. She is the daughter of former boxer Muhammad Ali from his third wife Veronica Porsche Ali.

Born: December 30, 1977 (age 34)Wikipedia


Garcelle Beauvais
An American actress, singer and former fashion model best known for her roles as hotel employee Francesca "Fancy" Monroe on The WB television sitcom, The Jamie Foxx Show Born: November 26, 1966 (age 45) Wikipedia
 
 

Cycle of Teen Pregnancy and Poverty...

Posted By Mocha Chick on Sep 12, 2012 at 12:15PM

When I watched this Youtube video I was drawn in from the moment this particular episode of Our America with Lisa Ling started to play.... I felt that this video highlighted many of the reasons why there is an epidemic of single, teen Mothers. It spoke about the fact that Single Motherhood is tripled simply due to the fact that a child is born into a single parent home. I was shocked to learn how good hard working people with great morals find themselves living the life of a single mother at such a young age.

For me it's hard to sometimes comprehend, how someone who is my age (29 yrs old) could have two or more children over the age of 5 years of age. It's hard to imagine myself giving up my teen years to raise a child. Thinking back on my teens I could often be found at the library, Church Functions, and various other community activities which included going to the local community gym for swimming, violin lessons which later turned to alto sax lessons, and ACT/SAT college prep courses. Even with all of the challenges I faced from my peers in regards to not being accepted; due to the fact that my parents home- schooled my brother and I, were vegetarian, and the fact that I had longer hair than most who have my complexion, I always felt isolated and "different". Even with all that, I was still able to navigate the social constructs of my life with little to no issues for the most part.

Even though my Parents were ULTRA Conservative and STRICT, I can honestly say that I'm thankful that they shielded Me in many ways from myself. I'm glad that I was able to safely transition from my teen years to young adulthood without becoming a single Mom. I feel that if I would have been a single Mom I would have stepped up to the plate like many of the Women that are in my circle. But, I'm relieved that I was given the opportunity to travel, attend private schools, and live in a "Christian Bubble" shielded in many ways from the dangers of my neighborhood or peer group....

Just looking at the circumstances of many close friends it's amazing to see the challenges that they face daily in terms of being labled a single Mom and the negative attention that brings for them socially. Watch the video. I feel that it will give you a different perspective of Teen motherhood...